Sunday, 10 August 2014

A letter to my first born.

To my beautiful first born daughter,

I hope that when you read this I would have already done my job well enough for you to already know this.

You're beautiful. You're amazing. You're unique.

You will always be as beautiful as you were the first time I looked at you.
You are a strong and intelligent girl, at just two years old you could melt the hearts of the people surrounding you.

Don't ever settle for less than what you're worth. Don't give in to the pressures around you and please, don't give yourself away to a person who doesn't respect you. Grasp the person you are and don't let anybody stop you from being the person you're destined to be.

Stop doubting yourself, stop seeing the worst in yourself. You're perfect.

Don't change the way you look to satisfy anybody else, because that little girl who used to walk around in her mums shoes, wearing the Tu-Tu over her jeans and the princess tiara tangled in her beautiful blonde ringlets knew she was different and that made her happy.

I look at you now and you're so small and I can't imagine you grown into a young woman and it scares me.
This world is full of so much hate that could easily destroy the hopes of anyone, but please, don't let it disappoint you, because despite the bad, there is so much beauty in the world.

I want you to travel, to see the world around you and I just wish that there was a way that you could see yourself through my eyes, because if that was possible, you would never doubt yourself again.

By now I would have said it a million times, but I love you.

I have loved since the moment I held you and looked into your eyes and seen the whole entire world, my entire world.

If for some reason I'm not longer around to remind you of all of this, please know that even at 17 as a single mother, you were the best thing that ever happened to me, your brother too.

You both gave my life meaning and you gave me a reason to wake up every morning.

If I'm no longer around to see the woman you have become then I want you to know that I am proud of you.
That nothing you do could ever make me ashamed to call you my daughter.

I've been proud of you since I announced that I was pregnant and even more proud when I introduced you to the world.

Watching you and your brother grow has been my best achievement and my biggest privilege.
Even if I wasn't to amount to much in my life time, I know that raising you both has been my biggest accomplishment.

I hope that when you read this we have relationship as close as what we have now, where you will lay with me and tell me your secrets and know that you can tell me anything without being judged.

I love you more than you could imagine and I hope that by the time you have read this that you have learned to love yourself as much as I love you.


Your biggest fan. <3

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